I promised myself that this blog wouldn’t always be about the “good stuff.” I wanted to be able to look back after I completed the race and see what I went through (training, emotions, the whole kit and kaboodle) to get to the finish line. So here goes…
Today was a rough morning. I was scheduled to do a 75 minute run. After having been in hot, humid Costa Rica for a week’s vacation with the family, the cold New England air was still too much for me. I have done my fair share of cold running this winter, but I’m just so over it! Hard to imagine that spring officially begins tomorrow. After procrastinating for a bit, I decided to go to Cornerstone (my local pool and workout center) and use the treadmill. When I got there, all of the treadmills were taken and there was someone waiting. I guess other people are feeling the same way I am! I was so upset! I didn’t know what to do. I got back in my car and went home.
I knew I had to do the run. Quite frankly, “NOT doing it” wasn’t really an option, although the thought crossed my mind, albeit fleetingly. I was resigned to the fact that I was going to have to run outside (for 75 minutes!). I was beside myself. I really didn’t want to do it. I got very upset and laid on my closet floor crying and moaning. I have never been so unmotivated to do a workout in my life! I thought, (and said out loud to Leland) “How can I do this race? What was I thinking?” He was very understanding, rubbed my back and told me that there will be days like this during this training. He said I should just get dressed and go out. Secretly I think he checked to ketubah (Jewish marriage contract) looking for an out.
So, I summoned the strength, got dressed and headed outside.
I brought a water bottle and left it on the bottom of my little road. I took one gel, as I thought 75 min was a long time to run without fuel. I did NOT run with the water bottle, so I only had water at 18 minutes. Then I ran a rolling hilly loop around my neighborhood. At 53 minutes, I ate the gel. I did not have water to wash it down, but I figured it was better than not having the gel at all.
I finished the run and drank the water walking up to my house. The weather was NOT as cold and bitter as I thought and I was dressed perfectly.
After all of that drama, the run was better than I had expected. I started out slowly, but felt I had a good pace going, even on the uphills. I was proud of myself for getting out there. I truly have no idea how I did it. It was a good experience for me to see “how the other half lives.” Most people I know have that problem every day. That experience was such a rarity for me, but it was very overwhelming and upsetting.
I imagine I’ll be feeling this way on race day many times. It’s good to get used to it sooner than later.